Self Portrait

How to paint a fair picture of one’s self? I want to adjust the picture, remove imperfections, change an angle to reflect who I want to be. Being content with me isn’t good enough—then I fear narcissism. To not glory in my faults or in my constitution, that is the challenge. The tendency is to share only the obvious, for a true portrait leaves nothing to ambiguity, no subjectivity to cower behind while appearing tall. Here is the picture:

I am or believe myself to be of average build; strong of eyesight; limited of wardrobe; endowed with life; fair-complexioned; slow to smile; restless by nature; simple and sincere; manipulative; hesitant to ask directions; kind to the undeserving; a tenement dweller; contemplative by small brooks; humbled by cliffs; reserved among strangers; fleet of foot; a seeker of adventure; studious; an admirer of diversity; reverent in forests; austere; determined in opposition; fond of gazing into shop windows; spontaneous in the morning; divided on the value of money; vain; unruly of hair; spirited on a bicycle; obsessed with words; mesmerized by blue sky; calculating; a hoarder of moments; given to music; decisive; enchanted by night air; a student of culture; sensible; respectful of large beasts; harmless to small animals; brilliant too late; passionate; skeptical of religion; observant; lagging at conversation; manic at sporting events; a stroller of streets; thoughtful of heights; a shallow philosopher; a hopeless romantic and an arrogant dreamer.

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